5 posts tagged “daughter”
Duchess: Mum, can you find me that book that's written in Haiku and is about spring?
Me: Uhhh... we don't even have one of those.
Duchess: Oh.
I am almost sure she expected me to write that book for her, tonight.
Littlest one: [doing homework] Daddy, is this book fiction or non-fiction?
Husband: Is there a fairy on the cover?
Littlest one: Yes.
Husband: That's pretty much a sign it's fiction, babes.
If you have kids, no matter how perfect you believe they are, eventually you're going to have to clean up their bedrooms. It's never pretty and rarely enjoyable, but if you go through these steps you might actually survive it.
1) Survey The Damage
Open the closet doors, pull open drawers, and look under the bed. Not only will this allow you a little bit of time to seethe, now you can determine whether you should go and start your coffee now or wait awhile, or plan for something a little harder, like a double vodka on the rocks.
2) Deal With The Bed
Push everything that isn't sheet-related off the bed. Make the bed.
3) Bulldoze Under The Bed
Carefully lower yourself to the floor and push everything you can out from under the bed. Watch out for gooey things, sticky things, smooshy things, and dead pets.
4) Deal With Clothing
Separate clothes from the toys and papers. Drape any clean clothes that need to be hung up on the bed; the kid must hang these up themselves. Put dirty laundry -- and there will be more than you bargained for -- into the laundry bin.
5) Pitch the Papers
If it looks really important, keep it. There should be two of these items; the rest will be crap. Sort out any with personally identifiable information (full names, addresses, etc.) to shred, and put the rest in the recycle bin. Shove anything that is obviously garbage into a trash bag. This includes broken toys, crushed crayons, loose beads, hardened Play-Doh, any novelty erasers, food (chewed or otherwise), Kleenex (used or otherwise), and any previously living things you can't resuscitate.
6) Bin the Toys
Anything you can salvage can be put into bins. Hair elastics and barrettes - one bin. Lego - another bin. And so on. If you don't have any of those dollar store plastic bins to sort things into, make sure you get a few before tackling your disaster area. Consider storing the toys out of the bedroom altogether -- if you have a playroom, or a basement area where the kids play, these would be ideal locations for keeping those things you hate stepping on every time you have to go in the bedroom.
7) Shelve the Books
Keeping any library books separate from the others, put books, binders, and notepads on the shelf. Schoolwork goes into the desk.
8) Vacuum
Spray, or dribble some nicely scented oil, on the vacuum filter. Vacuum thoroughly and without any remorse... only rescue from the bag anything that is valuable, like jewellery. The room will smell much improved.
9) Threaten Child
This is the most important step. Tell your kid that the next time they leave the place in this sort of shape and you are forced to clean it, you'll smear cooked cauliflower on the vacuum filter instead, and not only will the entire contents of the room be in the garbage bin their room will smell like grandma's apartment building.
There are things that happen to you during a normal day, that taken at face value mean absolutely nothing. If you start adding them up as you go along, though, there seems to be something in the universe trying to shout out a huge message into your ear.
Do you believe in this stuff? Do you believe that God (or whoever) is sending you a sign? Or is it all coincidence, and a side effect of living on this planet?
You guys know already that I write music. Specifically, music for film. This has become a huge dream for me, but I'll admit I'm not doing much, other than just writing and not being a music whore, to fulfill it. In a way I feel that if I never try, at least I coulda been a contenda, and not -- you know -- devastated. My husband got a huge lightning bolt of his own this summer after going to a concert, and he's now living out his own dream: a new drum kit, new (and fantastic) Paiste symbols, and he's in a band with some killer names.
It's awesome that he gets to do that. I love how he plays, that he kicks ass. He works hard and I'm proud as hell of him and his talent. But for me... it's not that he's unsupportive, it's more like he's very critical. He's not listening to what I'm saying. He thinks he knows better, but he just knows different.
Last night after another conversation about getting more into scoring, he mentioned that it's a shitload of work. And I know that. Boy, do I ever know it. But I have kids, and it occurred to me in a big way that it would be a really GOOD thing to watch them grow up, and not be working all the time, or obsessed with music and writing it, and how to squeeze some sort of emotion out of every unwasted note. So that was it. I went to sleep after deciding that I would just give it all up: no more writing music, and no more desire to write with a specific person. Finito. Bye, bye. Done.
This morning I was brushing the little one's hair and putting it up for her, and when I finished she skipped towards the door... but stopped and headed back. She has this little elfin face and she snuggled right into me, hugged me tight and kissed me, and breathed "You're the best mom ever" in that way she does.
Emotion: Relief. I totally made the right choice.
Later on I left the house to get some things at the store. I walked in the door, and bam -- hit right in the face with what I wanted to do.
Emotion: Ashamed. Cried a little in public.
Got back in the car and drove to the school. Turned on the radio and you guessed it. SMACK.
Emotion: Angry, and embarrassed. I'd cried a little again and felt like shaking a tiny fist at the universe.
All coincidence, of course. Or else it's a great big invisible brick getting dropped on my head: Live your dream, moron!
Can you live your dream and still be there for your kids? If you don't chase after it, do you end up resenting them? Or is it better to just give it all up and pretend your soul has dehydrated?
Tell me something good. Tell me you tasted your dream, and it was worth it.
Audio: Share a great love song.
It might not be a classic love song, but it is to me. I wrote, produced, and sang this love song to my six-month-old daughter, and every word of it is true. Listening to it I'm reminded of her sweet little baby face with those startling, beautiful eyes. I remember how I re-wrote it to include the vibraphone part and how my husband played drums for the track.
That's why I'm sharing it here: it's not famous, but it does mean a lot to me. It's a song about a great love.
